Early Saturday morning stroll along Paseo de Roxas

Here’s something I found on my notepad…I was spending my last few days at the office. I was trying to make the transition to my successor seamless and smooth. Overly busy with everything, it was dawn when I got out of the office. Luckily, it was a Saturday then so I can sleep all day thereafter. I didn’t go home right away. I strolled along Paseo de Roxas instead…and found myself into some kind of nostalgia again. And when it happens, my pen and paper come in very handly, then I started to scribble something I feel like scribbling. The following came to be another product of my nostalgia:

Originally written: August 23, 2008 @ 05:43 am.
Paseo de Roxas, Ayala Triangle.

Sitting while watching the early birds this Saturday morning brings me a stream of memories. Happy and unhappy alike. Now I feel nostalgic…again….

I used to do night shifts. After work @ 6 am, I’d always take Paseo de Roxas route then take a jeepney ride along Ayala Avenue. I usually get home with bagful of goodies - maybe a hot pandesal or a bunch of ripe mangoes or banana, depends on the season.

I’ve always lived each day of my life heartily not minding what the future may bring…not thinking what lies ahead. It was somehow a life of procrastination, reactive and complacent…and worst of all - it was very selfish.

Now, almost two years have passed…and I am into the same place again. I’m thinking of past undertakings, past decisions, past life…past mistakes. I can only hope I am better off now.

Life is still marred with constant struggles and of never-ending-dilemmas.

But whatever my past has caused me to become…I hope it made me a better individual. I hope I am more equipped now to face my future - the future which I persistently shunned of thinking before.

I hope I am more capable now of coming up with sound decisions…not with ones I will eventually mourn about.

I hope I can be unselfish this time…not promoting my own interests above those of my loved ones….

And when I pass by this place again, I hope I can only think of how better I can make myself at present than the person I used to be in my past….

FR

Posted in Reflections | No Comments »